Message to Venus – 1st ROAD BLOG from the “Pushing ‘The Envelope’ Tour”

The rock band, Message to Venus, is currently on the “Pushing ‘The Envelope’ Tour”. While they’re on this tour, they will be blogging for us. You can check out their first entry (with pictures) written by the band’s lead singer, Jandre Nadal, after the break.

“Anxiety holding me back from sleep, excitement about the adventure that awaits. I read other bands blogs and articles of all of this and it’s nothing but bitching and complaining. What did you expect? Celine Dion treatment? Red carpets, limos, fresh fruit baskets and silk towels to clean your balls after the show? No! You get a fucking bad ass sprinter that charges you testicles and anus for gas and insurance. Get rid of the back seats and get the dimensions down to lay out some quilts and sleeping bags. Park in a hopefully friendly zone to avoid harassment of wild hillbillies or wild boyz. Hopefully I won’t need to show off my machete and Edgar won’t need to use his aluminum baseball bat. We are fucking Puerto Ricans, we are defensive yet humble. Driving though the unknown territory into surprising gigs.

First stop at saint pettersberg. Beautiful bridge taking to the separated land to bad I had to take a leak I could only concentrate on cramping my leg holding my bladder down for another 30 min. Finally we arrive a the club, I run out of the van seeing other musicians in and out the back door. I rushed my self in looking for the fucking bathroom and find my self in a theater like atmosphere with some acid rock band doing a sound check, the sound was so amazing I was getting an erection from excitement. The sound board was as big as our van and it was a professional environment. Is this too good to be true? As I walk out side about to blow a load on my boys, JuanMa tells me “this is not the place”. Fuck my life! It’s the dive bar next door. Clouded with smoke and a much cheaper PA system we met the reality of what our level is. Fucking baby bands you kidding me? I’ve been doing this my whole life. Humbly paying our dues we will start from the bottom. So we met the other bands great vibes great people and a great show was done. Sold some merch, saw some tits and off we go to the next gig.

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5 hours of rain, fucking wild truck drivers, avoiding possums and deer. We make it to Gainesville, we again see our fellow band mates parked unloading through the back door. We met a cool cat named Wolfman, explains how the gig will flow with what we thought was 3 bands becomes 2 bands and a side freak show. Two very ugly dudes tattooed and pierced in places I did not know possible accompanied with two beautiful girls equally tattooed and a little person with no arms just fingers dangling out of his shoulders named the Pinguin man. Also tattooed and pierced to the tits and balls. Nice people just different. So we ended up playing the show to an empty room with just a couple of washed up biker chicks and other musicians. It was like a professional rehearsal. After the bands played two of the biker chicks bought our merch, we signed some tits and then the fucking freak show starts. With the Pinguin Man juggling sticks and shit! He concludes his act buy drilling a condom in his nose pushing it through the middle of his head with a screw driver hammering it with a bottle and coughing it out his mouth. Jesus fucking Christ. Meanwhile one of the girls starts to semi nude Gogo dance while the other idiots prepare for God knows what. We said fuck it lets go before some one loses a ring. We frustratedly get in the van and off to Orlando. Ahh the sight of beautiful Latin and and lush American ass. We get to the next backdoor unload our equipment in a graffiti and sticker infested environment. Greeted by a nice dude named Germ the sound man, we set up for a good gig confident of success. Turns out its a open mic night. Stars with a young death metal band, kids coughs blood and screams like he’s being raped by an uncle. They lasted three songs before the kid goes completely aphonic. Followed by and impressive hip hop duo called PFK, beats and rhymes pump the crowed. Lyrics of fucking bitches and smoking pot never goes wrong I guess. Then a great acid rock trio called III BONES with impressive pentatonic tones, a pretty 17 year old front girl with a similar vocal range of Janice Joplin, wild delay effects on the guitar songs of young love. Loved it. Then it was us… We set up on stage ready and confident, finally a crowed anxious to hear us. John’s guitar pedals didn’t work, after a few minors checks we managed to get it to work, then my fucking gear fails to sound. Are you kidding me? What are the odds of both guitarist gear to not work at the same time. We rushed to the situation and finally we get our shit together and managed to rock the crowd. Owners loved it so much they invited us for a full show for next September. We sold more merch than we expected and had a great time through the night. Dancing with random girls walking the wild streets or downtown Orlando at 3 am after a local rum fest. I’ve never had my ass grabbed so many times. Another 6 am sleep to get to the next gig. Lets see what more adventure await.”  -Jandre Nadal

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Did you enjoy this blog? Do you plan on going out to any of their tour dates? Let us know in the comments below!